I first want to introduce myself, I am Dené Payan, and I have physical and mental disabilities. My friend, Becky is helping me with this letter. (From Becky: I hope I do her story justice, Dené is a wonderful person).
I am 54 years with PTSD, results from a drowning accident in a car when I was 16 year old. Along with my mental and physical disabilities (I use a walker at times) I have social anxiety that I am overcoming with my service dog, Cassie. Before Cassie, I never left home; my brother did my grocery shopping and errands for me for many years. I am being treated medically for all that is going on with me. The hardest part of my life right now is my short-term memory loss, I can be told something and just a few minutes later it is forgotten. As you can imagine self-confidence is hard for me to come by and Cassie helps me tremendously overcome a lot of barriers. She takes care of me as if she was my parent and I was her child. We love each other very much. She is trained to notice any cues of my disabilities; I could not make it through a day without her. I am so blessed to have a legal and registered service dog in Cassie.
We live in Section 8 Diboll Housing in a very small 4-room apartment, I moved here after being on a waiting list for many housing authorities. Though sometimes I fear I made a mistake moving away from my family because of my disabilities, I am doing okay. I do not have the gas turned on in my home because of my short-term memory; doctors and others are worried I will forget something is on the stove. I am the master of microwave cooking not the best – but I cannot complain because I have food and a roof over my head, and of course my Cassie.
I am an active, serving member of my church. I attend a Cross Timbers Cowboy Church, on top of 2 worship meetings each week, Bible Study, ladies meetings and jamboree; I attend events in the rodeo arena! How cool is that? Worshiping God and watching bull riding, calf roping, barrel racing and so much more. I am enjoying life after years of hiding behind walls. I am getting to know people, forming relationships and making friends. God is so good!
One Saturday morning a lady from church called ME requesting help. To take her grocery shopping and to pay bills, of course, I said yes. Cassie and I hopped into my SUV and headed her way. We picked her up and my SUV died shortly after picking her up. It restarted a few times and I was able to get her back home. After dropping her off, my SUV died again. There was no starting it and certainly was not going anywhere. (My anxiety was peaking a bit). I had the SUV towed to the church. Cassie and I spent the night in the SUV at the church. The next morning after church, 2 different mechanics looked at it and said the motor was locked up and with all the other issues it had, it is not worth repairing. Both of my mechanic friends said it would be smarter to look for a new car. I called my son, also a mechanic and he agreed. (He had worked on it so many times before). I called my finance company, explained the issue, they picked up the car.
I am praying with faith that God will provide the funds for a new vehicle. Believing and praying Philippians 4:19 “And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.” God has carried me so far. I can look back at notes, pictures and such and see His hand on my life. Psalms 84:11 “For the LORD God is a sun and shield; the LORD bestows favor and honor. No good thing does he withhold from those who walk uprightly”.
After thinking, praying, thinking, praying some more, I am in hopes of collecting enough money to purchase a safe and dependable vehicle. Nothing is too big for God. I need for Cassie and I to go to church, run errands, go grocery shopping and visit my family. I want to do these things; God has really worked in me and continues to do so. I want to help and volunteer in my church again. I want to use my gift of service. Would you please consider a small donation to help me obtain a vehicle? I would be ever so grateful. If you need people to verify my information and things I am telling you, I will be happy to give that information to you. If you would prefer to send a donation directly to me so that GoFundMe doesn’t take 25% of your donation, my address is below. If you would prefer to work with my church, the address is Dené Payan c/o Cross Timbers Cowboy Church, PO Box 118 Lufkin, Texas 75902. I sincerely thank you for your prayerful consideration.
809 Nelson Dr
Diboll, Texas 75941